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Raven that never ceases to
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--from Eina (sometime 1997)
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
What Happened
Do you believe that there is no such thing as an accident? That everything is pre-ordained and that every curve in our life's road was already pre-mapped by a greater hand? Where then does free will kick in, if at all?
The reason I ask is that I was recently in an accident. No need to worry, it's not that serious. I just unintentionally hit a car. What made it so bad was not that I was driving a relatively brand new car nor the fact that I had to face the injured party. It was bad because the car I hit was immobile--yup, it was parked just right beside me. Call it amateurism or wrong judgment or even stupidity. I have been berating myself with harsher adjectives so I honestly do not need anyone's help in doing that right now, okay?:-) But I'm digressing. . .
So, anyway, I spoke with the owner of the other car (who happens to be really considerate) and it seems that we would settle this matter amicably within the day. Before we spoke, however, I was making good use of my time by consoling myself by saying that everything happens for a reason. Who knows? The owner of the car might just be the guy (I correctly assumed this after one look at the car) that one of my single girl friends might end up with. If hitting one car accomplishes that, then I guess I can hit a couple more. Just kidding!:-)
This brings me to the ancient debate on free will vs. destiny. I most certainly did not hit that car intentionally. Does that mean that I was meant to? If I did not choose it, then was it destined? So, are all negative unintentional things in life destined to happen? Are they not a product of little choices made in the past? I ask because I do not know. I write because I will never be able to answer. I can only offer a resolution: acceptance. Whether I chose or did not choose a particular outcome, I should and must accept this. Maybe not instantly, but inevitably. The good thing about this is that I have faith. Faith that I am always in good hands (hello Papa God!) and that something good will always come out of everything. True, my driving skills could stand improvement and it was a wake up call to do so asap. But I am happy that I picked up a lot from the incident, namely:
· In a state of panic, sanity kicks in after a few (or a lot of) deep breaths. So before you actually panic, take deep breaths immediately.
· Your conscience is your guide. I had the perfect opportunity to drive away. No witnesses, no nothing. But I know I could not and would not sleep well in the coming years if I did.
· God is good. The owner of the car is actually nice. I spoke with him for almost thirty minutes mostly about karma, mistrust and doing good. He said I gave him good parking tips so I hope that makes it even.:-)
· People are considerate. My family and friends, who were the first ones I expected to scold and lecture me, turned out to be really understanding and helpful.
· I am a part of a great team. My teammate, I thank you. I don't particularly care if you are here because I chose to or because I was destined to. You are there to comfort me when I am meanest to myself. Alam ko namang pag ok na ako, saka mo ako pagsasabihan. Hehe. . . I don't mind.
· I have to face the music gracefully. (Okay, Daddy, I have good news and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?)
I end this first entry with an unfortunate note: the owner of the car is already married. Too bad. I already thought of Pat, Dimps and Rossel. Be that as it may, anything can still happen--whether by choice or by chance.
The reason I ask is that I was recently in an accident. No need to worry, it's not that serious. I just unintentionally hit a car. What made it so bad was not that I was driving a relatively brand new car nor the fact that I had to face the injured party. It was bad because the car I hit was immobile--yup, it was parked just right beside me. Call it amateurism or wrong judgment or even stupidity. I have been berating myself with harsher adjectives so I honestly do not need anyone's help in doing that right now, okay?:-) But I'm digressing. . .
So, anyway, I spoke with the owner of the other car (who happens to be really considerate) and it seems that we would settle this matter amicably within the day. Before we spoke, however, I was making good use of my time by consoling myself by saying that everything happens for a reason. Who knows? The owner of the car might just be the guy (I correctly assumed this after one look at the car) that one of my single girl friends might end up with. If hitting one car accomplishes that, then I guess I can hit a couple more. Just kidding!:-)
This brings me to the ancient debate on free will vs. destiny. I most certainly did not hit that car intentionally. Does that mean that I was meant to? If I did not choose it, then was it destined? So, are all negative unintentional things in life destined to happen? Are they not a product of little choices made in the past? I ask because I do not know. I write because I will never be able to answer. I can only offer a resolution: acceptance. Whether I chose or did not choose a particular outcome, I should and must accept this. Maybe not instantly, but inevitably. The good thing about this is that I have faith. Faith that I am always in good hands (hello Papa God!) and that something good will always come out of everything. True, my driving skills could stand improvement and it was a wake up call to do so asap. But I am happy that I picked up a lot from the incident, namely:
· In a state of panic, sanity kicks in after a few (or a lot of) deep breaths. So before you actually panic, take deep breaths immediately.
· Your conscience is your guide. I had the perfect opportunity to drive away. No witnesses, no nothing. But I know I could not and would not sleep well in the coming years if I did.
· God is good. The owner of the car is actually nice. I spoke with him for almost thirty minutes mostly about karma, mistrust and doing good. He said I gave him good parking tips so I hope that makes it even.:-)
· People are considerate. My family and friends, who were the first ones I expected to scold and lecture me, turned out to be really understanding and helpful.
· I am a part of a great team. My teammate, I thank you. I don't particularly care if you are here because I chose to or because I was destined to. You are there to comfort me when I am meanest to myself. Alam ko namang pag ok na ako, saka mo ako pagsasabihan. Hehe. . . I don't mind.
· I have to face the music gracefully. (Okay, Daddy, I have good news and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?)
I end this first entry with an unfortunate note: the owner of the car is already married. Too bad. I already thought of Pat, Dimps and Rossel. Be that as it may, anything can still happen--whether by choice or by chance.
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